Apples for Ava: Dear Ava

Dear Ava,

A lot of people tell me that I hold you too much. You have spent the majority of your first 2 months in my arms. To some people this is a bit excessive and they feel that I'm spoiling you with too much attention and that one day it will backfire. People say that you won't feel secure unless I am with you and that you won't learn to self soothe or sleep by yourself. I could not disagree more.

I hold you because I love you so much and I don't want to miss one moment of you. I hold you because I couldn't hold you for the first four days of your life and the next seven days were limited. I feel that I need to make up for all that lost time and bonding that we should have had. I hold you so much because you are my heart beating outside of my body and I need to have you close.

I am so sorry for everything that you have had to endure in your life so far and I wish that I could take away all of the obstacles that were placed in front of you. You are only a baby and you should not have had to go through what you did and what you are still experiencing. For that, I will continue to hold you until you outgrow my lap. And when that happens, I promise you that I will be holding your hand as I walk beside you through your life.

Love,
Mommy